According to one bitter grandmother, the real unsung heroes aren’t the mothers of disabled children — they are, in fact, the mothers of the mothers of those little disability kiddos.
Pamela Grandes, 67, says internet praise of “disability moms” has missed the mark entirely, and she feels that she herself is actually entitled to that praise.
“My 39-year-old daughter Carly has a four-year-old kid with a disability, and she is constantly complaining about all the appointments, the kid crying, all the messes she has to clean up. Guess who’s the one who has to listen to all of that complaining?”
The grandmother stressed that, while she does empathize with her daughter’s struggles, they aren’t as much disability-mom struggles as they are just run-of-the-mill situations every parent deals with.
“Last week she said nobody understands how hard it is to feed a child with dietary restrictions. I had to remind her that for the first eight years of her life she wouldn’t eat anything that was sour, salty, too crunchy or ‘shaped funny.’”
She elaborated that, while motherhood itself is already a challenge, it isn’t all that fun to see your insufferable daughter complaining on Facebook every day either.
“Back in my day we were miserable mothers too, but we knew how to hide it! There’s a real pride in that, and I think this new generation of parents has lost it.”
Just when we were about to start showering Grandes with long-overdue love and a cute little trophy we bought, another voice chimed in. It was her own mother, Beatrice, 91, and she had some words to share ….
by Steven Verdile